Power. Do you embrace it or run from it?

What is your first reaction to the word power?
Does is scare you?
Do you think it is an inherently bad thing?
Do you seek it?
Do you think power can be built?

Let’s discuss power and what it means for each of us.

There are two types of power, positional and personal power. Having positional power brings with it important obligations to use that power well and to achieve results beyond our personal goals and needs. Personal power can be a bit trickier for some of us and it is something to consider and actively manage. Why don’t some of us embrace power?

Professor Jeffrey Pfeffer (Stanford) says we are our own biggest barrier to having personal power and there are two main reasons for this:

Not willing to make the tradeoffs needed for building personal power.
Reluctance to accept that we live in a hierarchical society and that the world is not fair and just.

Let’s start with the tradeoffs needed to build and hold our personal power. It is important to be prepared to:

Have a fundamental belief that we are worthwhile
Take chances and be prepared to fail if that is what happens
Let go of concern about what other people think of us
Give up the need to be liked (this doesn’t mean giving up being kind, careful and considerate in our approach)
Recognise that if we make decisions there will always be some people who don’t agree with the decision
Choosing strategic versus fun activities – this means cultivating networks across a range of people. An example is always having lunch with your friends (the people you want to interact with) rather that choosing to interact with the people who are important for your network
Recognising the need to work hard.

In practice this means being aware of any negative self-talk. This includes thoughts that might run along the following lines:

They know more than me, so I’ll just listen to what everyone else has to say
I don’t want to be considered a failure
I need to keep people happy
I want to help and support other people
It is better not to rock the boat and to just go with the flow
It is easier if I continue to be around the people I am safe and comfortable with
I’d better not get too big for my boots
I don’t want to stand out in the crowd and draw attention to myself
I’m worried I might make other people uncomfortable
But I’m a people pleaser, I can’t do that.

The other important point made by Professor Jeffrey Pfeffer is that we live in a hierarchical society and are sometimes reluctant to accept this reality. This might mean we:

Rebel against people telling us what to do in organisations where this is appropriate
Don’t accept the power that we do have (that is displaying and using our positional and personal power)
Are prepared to subordinate ourselves to others and meet their needs in circumstances where we don’t need to do this and it isn’t appropriate.

Some of us believe the world should be fair and just and this may hold us back if we fail to tackle issues that need to be addressed. Instead, we might hope for some form of future retribution along the lines of ‘they will get it in the end.’

In practice this might mean that we:

Put off doing important leadership work such as making tough decisions or having a hard conversation about some-one’s performance. It is magical thinking to believe that people can see what is going on and will modify their behaviour accordingly without us having to do the necessary work.
Wish and hope that conflicts and disputes will dissipate over time instead of dealing with them constructively and head on
Not speak up about our worth and achievements and hoping others will be able to see our intrinsic merits and value
Don’t put effort into building networks with people who can assist us in our career and life
Put time and effort into working to deadlines and goals given by others and not putting sufficient energy into our own goals and plans for the future.

It is important to be prepared to:

Be vigilant about what is going on and build awareness of the power dynamics around us.
Take strategic actions when required in light of our awareness of the power dynamics around us
Address issues head on when needed.

Your response:

What are your thoughts on power?
How have you built your power?
Are you aware of any of the limitations listed here that might limit your power?

In our work coaching leaders, we encourage people to observe their self-talk and consider how it reflects their mental model of the world. The really hard work of self-development and growth involves rethinking old beliefs and habits that no longer serve us well and making changes that support ourselves, our capacity to lead and the achievement of our goals.