By Tulsi van de Graaff, Partner, Brave People Solutions BRAVE stands for: Be ready Raise the issue Assertively communicate Validate Empathise Too many times conflicts escalate, misunderstandings spiral out of control and relationships deteriorate because of a failure to have a BRAVE conversation.  As human beings, each with our own distinct values, needs, history and […]

By Tulsi van de Graaff, Partner Brave People Solutions Work life can be wonderful, and it can be really challenging.  It’s often the people you work with who are the make or break.  Sometimes you can feel like you’re going crazy having to deal with so many challenging behaviours.   It’s the unspoken resentment, the anger and frustration, people avoiding each […]

Going to work exposes us to many different people and a wide range of behaviour.  Mostly the people we work with are decent, hardworking people and many times the people we work with we feel close to and they might even become our friends.  Most people come to work wanting to do a good job […]

Here at Brave People Solutions, we keep coming up against conflict. Not our own, but in the teams we work with and support. One of the hardest things about conflict is that it is not natural to want to constructively address it. Most people tell us ‘I was hoping it would go away’. Another challenge […]

Under the headline ‘Newton apologises for controversial jokes’, in the Sydney Morning Herald, Bert Newtown is quoted as saying ‘If I did offend somebody or anybody or a lot of people, I apologise – but I can’t promise I won’t do it again because that is the way I work’. Is that an apology? In […]

Some people can’t wait to get feedback on how they are going at work and actively seek it out. Others learn over time to listen to feedback and ideas from others and use the information constructively. In our experience, there are a small group of people who find listening to feedback hard and this may […]

It’s free, takes little time and is transformative for staff and teams. Why then is it missing so often in our teams? Praise is more important than we realise and so is constructive feedback – feedback is how we learn and develop. It is important for all managers to be skilled in giving constructive and […]

Most of us know the value of working with people who are good to work with and working with a manager with strong leadership and people skills is a rare joy.  Why is it then that there continues to be such a strong focus on qualifications and work history for promotion and recruitment at all […]

Recently a good friend said to me ‘and we know you are not backwards in coming forward’ and I noticed this wasn’t said in an admiring tone.  It made me ponder the assertiveness I have fought hard to build, why I value it and why I was shocked that this attribute is not considered an […]

Our work in supporting people to perform well at work has shown that some conflict between colleagues is so long-standing and deeply entrenched that there is simply no way back over the mountain of hurt, shame, indignation and thoughts of revenge to reach a place of resolution.  At best there might be an accommodation of […]

Conflict at work is inevitable and part of life and yet a lot of effort goes into avoiding conflict.  The hope that by avoiding it, conflict will go away seems to linger in the face of all evidence to the contrary.  Conflict does not miraculously self-resolve and most often does not dissipate over time.  What […]

As team leaders or managers in a large organisation we can sometimes feel powerless and frustrated by (amongst other things): Clunky processes and systems Changes to the organisation that you don’t want, which don’t seem sensible or weren’t explained well Unreasonable sort deadlines and cumbersome reporting requirements. Even though we might feel powerless in the […]